I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize