He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
