I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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