is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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