STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
