You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
