those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize