they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
