is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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