i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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