So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
