Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
