Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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