Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
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