I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
