I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
