I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i wish my penis had a tongue
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
