drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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