everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Panties = found
Randomize
