nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
