I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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