does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
how do you play pong handcuffed?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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