He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
