Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
