somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
