He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
