Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
