I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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