He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize