Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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