we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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