I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
