I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
