Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
