Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
