He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
