I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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