God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize