Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i drank out of a bidet.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize