I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize