I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
