yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize