So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize