i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
