I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
