I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
