her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
