The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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