You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
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