Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
